Oh hey, a blog! I should write in it and stuff!
Thanks, Rambo! Really can’t wait to see you drag your withered ass through another sequel that nobody asked for. Really…really can’t wait. Fuck.
So yeah! There were plans to write. Those plans went up in a blaze of malaise and apathy. But that fire was pretty non-committal and was easily extinguished, and now here we are. Lucky us.
This banter is absolute shit. Know what isn’t shit? Music! Thanks, Andrew W.K.! You should seriously be the theme song to everything made from now on.
Okay, a lot of music is absolute hot fucking garbage. Let’s ignore that and check out what I like to listen to, because I like to feel like a big man. I’m important, goddammit! Sweet merciful fuck, let’s just start this thing up before I continue babbling like a pompous asshole who likes to think that he’s entertaining.
Long story short : Music that was new to me in 2017, or late 2016. Doesn’t matter when it actually came out, just that I hadn’t really listened to it before last year. The list isn’t nearly as long as last year’s was, because that was utterly insane. But apparently I’m a size queen because I’m going to stack on some quick honorable mentions! EVEN MORE TIME BEFORE I GET TO THE POINT! YOU’RE WELCOME!
Bones (UK) – Just a warning for parents : watching the intro sequence of that video around little kids is going to lead to questions like “What is that man doing to that lady?” You have been warned. Apparently there was some long forgotten shitty band called Bones already, so they added the UK to their name? Or they just did it because they liked it? And/or they’re British? I don’t fucking know (Actually, they are British. I do know that part). I also have no goddamn idea what to classify this music style as. Electro-drum-sass? Who fucking cares. Genre titles mean nothing anyway, so just enjoy it. And the three other singles they have (Make that four). And that’s it. No actual album yet, hence the honorable mention. Come for the catchy beat that drills into your fucking head, stay for the cunnilingus! Okay kids, it’s time for that talk…
Greta Van Fleet – I actually really like these guys, but they have a single 8 track EP, half of which was previously released material. And that’s it. And they’re pretty much the greatest Led Zeppelin cover band of all time. Close your eyes and tell me for certain that you could definitely tell the two apart and I’ll punch you in the fucking nuts for lying to me. The goddamn kid on the mic sounds like Robert Plant. It’s uncanny! I’m curious to see (hear, I suppose) what direction they follow from here. Hopefully it’s a tad less clone-ish.
Tech N9ne – This man lives as the ultimate example that everyone needs an editor. He puts out multiple double length albums every year, splitting his time between his own stuff and Collabos collections that link him up with seemingly everyone involved in music on planet Earth. Maybe that’s the end goal? The problem with being that prolific is that you end up being very inconsistent and wobbly. So while the good stuff is REALLY DAMN GOOD, there’s too much other stuff that just…yeah.
